The end of a beautiful adventure

And then, despite the hours and hours in the plane, it feels like you are ‘suddenly’ back home. Suddenly there is the whole meal bread and the Dutch cheese you have been dreaming about, the pasta and the pesto, the family and friends, you can walk through the streets unnoticed... And there is the cold rain, the dark which comes just a bit after 4pm, the big anonymous streets and Timor Leste feels very far away, too far away at times. What is left is a head and a heart full of memories, a laptop full of pictures and videos and the eyes that are compelled towards that little island above Australia every time I see a world map.

Before I went, Timor Leste was a name, it was a place constructed out of that what I had read about it and out of the few pictures I had seen. Now that little spot on the map is connected to the people who live there, to the beautiful places I have seen there, to the emotions I have felt there. It is connected to a part of my life, and important part of my life. And so the world map is no longer the same as it was before, because there is this tiny bit of map that now, like other parts of the map, means much more than just a bit of paint. The last week in Timor Leste was full! Full of last-minute interviews, visits, packing, goodbye parties and a constant feeling of being split between sadness about leaving and happiness not only about going home but also as a form of thankfulness for all the important things the time in Timor Leste has given me… At Ba Futuru we had the last show case on the 14th of December and I had my farewell party there

And I listened for the ‘last time’ to the music that always surrounded me at Ba Futuru

And then I left those graffiti walls behind, I said goodbye to the people whom a few months ago had been strangers whose language I did not speak, now it was hard to part from them. But the music I take with me, it does neither need a bag nor a visa. On the 16th I had my birthday and farewell party at the university. To celebrate my birthday with all those people who in such as short period of time had come to feel so much like old friends was something very special. The day was filled by the bitter-sweet feeling that I was so thankful for having them and at the same time so sad about leaving them the next day. It was an afternoon filled with

Cake

Wishes

Singing

Eating, and even dancing!

The next day after a last round of hugs at Ba Futuru and touching goodbye at the airport with at least half of the Women, Peace and Leadership people and other friends I boarded the plane to Jakarta wondering when I would put foot on this soil, breathe in this air, and meet these people again. The only way to keep going forward was to promise myself it would not be long. The days in Jakarta, the hours and hours in the plane, the hours of delay due to bad weather conditions, they all seem like a dream now, the only thing that feels real about them is that they took me very far away from Timor Leste… In Holland I immediately stumbled into an ongoing family get-together and this is the first moment I have found the time and the peace of mind to write my last blog about this adventure… Looking back at the last five months, I feel that they have been an important part and time of my life and that the people I met played an important role in this. I have the feeling that in some future, when someone asks me ‘what brought you to be who you are today?’ that Timor Leste will be one of the ingredients in my answer. Whether I am one of those foreigners who lost her heart to this little half-island, yes, I guess I am…what that will mean for the future…I don’t know…stay tuned…you might find out on this blog in some near or far future!